The story of my landlord:

In my flat the cleaner regularly reports back to the land lord. Due to some health and safety law, nothing is allowed to be placed in the hall way. We don't have a lounge so the hall way is our comunal chillaxing area.

In the past year we have lost a fold out bed seat and Saab car seat from the hall because the land lord took them away, apparently a fire hazzard.

Last night I was walking home from uni about 11pm. On my journey I passed a couch in the street, boviously left out for the bin men. Upon my return to the flat I propsitioned my flat mate Duncan with my master plan.

"Yo, lets get a couch off the street and put it in the hall way. We can sit on it for a week or so then the land lord will chuck it out."

Duncan agreed and we collected the couch from the street. It is a 3 seater and quite heavy. After much effort we managed to get it up the stairs to our 2nd floor flat. Anna wasn't happy as she thought it would be infested with insects. I sprayed it with some lynx and now it seems quite nice.

Now I can look forward to the landlord coming and having lots of hassle to take it out of the flat and dispose of it, thinking he will be pissing us off when in fact the best thing about having the couch is knowing it will annoy him. When it is gone I won't miss it too much as we are used to living without one, but I will try and find another one on the street and bring it back to.